Okay, so hear me out

As an Introvert, I love to sit down and just think things out. I also enjoy researching. With all this lung scarring crap, I just want to know. I can\’t just sit here and wait for the Pulmonary Specialist to call me. I must be ARMED!!! 
So some things I am thinking about might be tough to read – I\’m just being transparent. I sure hope I am way off base and most likely, I am. I don\’t know yet. One thing, I have now learned how important it is to have healthy lungs. I knew it, yet I didn\’t know it. I think I just thought that was a given – you don\’t smoke because it is harmful to your lungs. As I read and research, I am learning that lung scarring is not good. Not even a little bit. However, I did read from the American Lung Association that: 
 Small areas of lung scarring typically aren’t serious. 
They shouldn’t affect your quality of life or life expectancy.
I\’m hoping this is the case for me. I am a little down because of the way I feel. I am fatigued and out of breath. We took a 15-minute leisurely walk around the block and I was winded. This is CRAZY. I can\’t believe this is happening to me. That dry, hacking unproductive cough – when I laugh, when I cry, when I talk too much – every morning, every evening. I sat outside for Halloween and it wasn\’t that cold around 65, but I could feel the cold dampness from the grass, inside my chest. My chest muscles are tender to the touch. 
Am I just imagining this? I would think perhaps a little of it is. I\’m hoping…
If it is Pulmonary Fibrosis which is what I fear – it would be better to have cancer. There is no cure, no radiation, no chemotherapy. Lung transplant? Only if you are a viable candidate and if you do, there are still risks and the fact you must take an average 25-30 pills a day to keep the lungs from rejecting. No thanks. I have a hard enough time with the few pills I do take. Only 2 drugs are available and they pretty much kick your butt physically but STILL are not a cure because Pulmonary Fibrosis is a progressive disease. How fast it progresses is different for each person. The American Lung Association: 
 A diagnosis of PF can be very scary. When you do your research, you may see average survival is between three to five years. This number is an average. There are patients who live less than three years after diagnosis, and others who live much longer.  
This can\’t be right. 
So I will wait till I hear back about the appointment. I don\’t expect it to come fast – I live in a rural area and we only have 4 Pulmonary Specialists. Should we consider, going to Sacramento? The Bay Area? I don\’t know yet. 
I sure hope I am wrong. Good thing – as I post these thoughts, I am not freaked out. I can still carry on doing what I always do. Try to keep busy. I guess that is called HOPE and maybe some denial. And just maybe I am jumping the gun, which I have done in the past. It sure has made me think of my mortality more than ever before. 
It\’s freaky…

From My House – For the homemaking side of me

18 thoughts on “Okay, so hear me out

  1. Anonymous November 2, 2020 / 7:29 pm

    Everyone needs both hope and denial – it's what keeps us real. And if I can give you one word of advice no matter your prognosis – please ignore the stats. I intend to be a stat pusher/buster = it requires work and faith and hope to do that (and I am not talking religion, just faith in yourself). Hugs


  2. Anonymous November 2, 2020 / 9:19 pm

    Sac or the Bay Area would be my way to go…Sending good thoughts your way ~


  3. Anonymous November 3, 2020 / 12:47 am

    I hope you can get an appointment soon just for peace of mind with knowing what you are dealing with.betty


  4. Anonymous November 3, 2020 / 12:50 am

    Chin up. Stats are meant to be broken and here is hoping that you just have a small case of scarring on your lungs. God bless.


  5. Anonymous November 3, 2020 / 4:56 am

    I'll pray for you! And, hope you'll be better sooner than later!


  6. Anonymous November 3, 2020 / 9:32 pm

    You're not a stat, you're a person who is dealing with hard stuff hang in there take it day by day


  7. Anonymous November 3, 2020 / 11:00 pm

    Oh Debby, I'm so sorry you are going through all this. I read some of your postsbelow, and you are having a hard time. I had bronchitis a few times many years ago, and the cough was so bad that it lingered on for weeks after. I felt that wasn't good for my lungs to be coughing that hard and for so long. I hope you get the answers you seek, and that you feel better. And Yes, always remain in HOPE.~Sheri


  8. Anonymous November 4, 2020 / 6:40 pm

    Oh that is scary! Stay optimistic if you can. Hopefully you can get a appointment sooner than later!


  9. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:02 pm

    I just found out that a friend of mine has pulmonary fibrosis. She is going to the Cleveland Clinic for treatment and hoping for a lung transplant. She is 75 and a former smoker.


  10. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:23 pm

    I am realizing that. I joined a group and that is what everyone says. I feel much better, no matter what happens.


  11. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:24 pm

    They have major waiting lists – I thought about UC Davis. I only have to wait till Feb 2021. That's only about 3 months and not as long as some places.


  12. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:25 pm

    Sometime in Feb 2021 – I feel good about it all, after I have armed myself with information and plugged myself in to a support group.


  13. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:27 pm

    Thanks Sheri. I'm keeping the faith.


  14. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:27 pm

    I've turned the corner – I'm dealing with whatever much better now.


  15. Anonymous November 7, 2020 / 9:28 pm

    Wow. I hope the best for her.


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